Time gives strength
Time can give scars
I choose to spend my time
Staring at the Stars
(B & W self portrait,
Taken with a Micromax Canvas A1)
I have always been camera shy, because of my lack of self esteem and negative self worth.
Photography has always been a passion so it was easy and natural for me to be behind the lens.
However, in efforts of trying to boost my self esteem and work on handling my depression and anxiety I chose to become the subject. As a photographer being the subject means a lot of work. The way I reflect myself is also reflective of what I feel inside. Hopefully there will be brighter portraits in the future.
For anyone else struggling with such issues, I would suggest go and catch hold of your camera. You need not share the images, but do click. You will be amazed as how sub-consciously we internalise perceptions, often self- created. It took me a lot of effort to not only take the picture, but to use my creative insight into depicting myself in the truest way possible, and then to muster guts to publish it. (I have had it in my phone for weeks now)
Depression tends to dull our spontaneous, creative side, and puts us on a track of self criticism. It has coloured the way I see myself, and the way I choose to depict myself as well.